It seems that I'm a superstar. No really. By some cosmic coincidence I share my name with the righteous but ridiculous hero of a series of comical short films called Sockbaby.

Now listen, however much I might enjoy these films (and I might), neither I nor this site have anything to do with Sockbaby or the redoubtable Sockbaby phenomenon. Understand? So you can quit emailing me and asking me when the next film comes out.

How did this happen? Who wakes up in the morning and decides to call a fictional character Ronnie Cordova? My friend C always told me I had a name like a third rate lounge singer, a stinging remark which always pleased me greatly.

The confusion over names is a little annoying (I was here first after all), but the fact remains that the line of dialogue quoted in my subject line makes the whole thing fabulous. My name really is Ronnie Cordova and that's something I probably really would say, were I ever to find myself in a kung fu battle with aliens wearing fedoras.

Now of course people are going to assume my name is a cheesy pseudonym taken from the films, which is pretty hilarious when you think about it. I've been usurped!