I never had good luck with mothers. Not my own, I mean others' mothers. Once in a while you meet someone's mother and you're completely blown away by her, and what's more the unexpected excellence of this mother throws your friend or acquaintance into a whole new positive light, your estimation of them is considerably enhanced as a result of their mother being such a trip. A funny, warmhearted, easygoing mother can definitely cause one's stock to rise like the sun in the east.

But there's a danger here, too. Mothers, and to a much lesser degree fathers, have the uncanny ability, the sinister talent we'll call it, of being able to mask or direct attention away from their own worst qualities, in short bursts, when it's time to meet the son or daughter's friends. So a mother who really tries the patience of her son or daughter in any number of infuriating ways can beguile the friends into thinking she's the coolest mother ever, when in fact she might very well be Pure Evil, and this results in the child not only looking on in stunned amazement wondering why the mother can be so effortlessly agreeable for them but never for him or her, but also in the general opinion of the son or daughter among the group of friends being markedly downgraded, even permanently damaged or completely destroyed. What before struck them as reasonable complaints against the mother now are re-evaluated and cast in doubt. All future remarks by the son or daughter against the mother will be looked on with suspicion, as they have seen the grace and easy amicability of the mother with their own eyes, which they trust far more than the hysterical anecdotes of a known malcontent whose constant niggling snipes against the mother had frankly become tedious and repetitive in any event.

This is why it's rarely a good idea to introduce your mother to your friends if it can be avoided. There are too many ways for it to go horribly wrong (for you), it's simply not worth the risk. To see your manipulative, strategically lachrymose, guilt-tripping, domineering, intransigent mother come off to your charmed friends not as the Agent of Evil she is but as some kind of Super Mom of Benign Good Cheer, and their judgment of you plummeting just as her reputation soars, well, it's really too much to bear.