I am wondering if I know just what the hell I'm doing. There are times I ask my reflection in the bathroom mirror, "Do you know what the hell you're doing?" or "What are you doing? What?" Then I pause, studying my face for signs of comprehension.

I'm not great at a very, very large number of things. For a vastly smaller number of things, I possess some minimal level of competence, enough to get by, but that doesn't help because it so happens that those aren't things I particularly care about doing well. I should be engaged in some introspection, there should be winnowing and culling, steely hardnosed analysis, with flowcharts constructed for clarity, until I arrive, finally, at that thing I am supposed to be doing.