Next Wednesday I'm scheduled to receive flattery from a stranger. I'm penciled in. Not just flattery is involved, but flattery was promised and I will not refuse it. I am not in a position, just now, to refuse flattery. I'm hoping this unrefused flattery is profuse. I like hearing I'm great in ways even I never suspected. I am aware of certain rare skills in my possession. For instance, I often misread the word enthusiasm as euthanasia. Not an impressive talent to you maybe, but I find it invaluable. Also, you know how the words "that close" are always accompanied by a gesture in which the index finger and the thumb are brought into proximity to illustrate the breathtaking closeness under discussion? Well, I am able, on the first try, in one smooth flourish, an astonishing fluency of the hand, to bring these digits quite remarkably near to one another so that mere millimeters separate them, perhaps a single millimeter, perhaps even less, perhaps a span of distance best measured in the breadth of molecules, without allowing the fingers to touch, as doing so would negate the entire point of the gesture. Thus I am able to indicate just how close I came, or it came, whatever it is came, to drive the point home, to really make the case for how close the call was, such is the power of the expertly deployed gesture. On a similar note, I also have the highly-developed ability to perceive traffic accidents that didn't happen but easily could have, and to recreate the near-miss to people in the backseat, with swooping gestures and dramatic language, so that all passengers are reminded of the fragility of life and our tenuous hold on a state of unshattered bones, unbruised flesh, unspeared guts, uncracked craniums, unjostled brains, unpoked eyes, undeflated lungs, unruptured hearts, unsliced arteries, unkabobed glands, unremoved limbs, unhemorrhaged organs, and so on. I also have the ability to subtly change the subject in conversation so that no one remembers what we were talking about and the whole thing just grinds to a halt and an awkward silence commences.